The Last Secret Baby Tooth! Part 5.

BY ALL MEANS, PLEASE LAY DOWN ON, AND MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE IN, THE OVER-SIZED HAMMOCK, WHILE THE HOSTESS BRINGS MARTINIS AND MARGARITAS, BUT BEWARE OF MAKING THIS REALITY INTO A DREAM, because at that point, your destiny will be out of the control of yourself and the HSR, and your “whistle while you work undisturbed in the airy artist’s loft” smile will be at the mercy of the vicissitudes of your scarily deep subconscious mindscape!

Quick Background: our fearless protagonist must cross a vast space… and get to the Altar quickly with the baby tooth, so it can be crushed in the mortar while lit from the sacred rays of the three suns, but there’s one problem…he can’t fly to it!

I’m standing on the edge of, and looking down into, what seems to be a bottomless cliff. 

In front of me is a big cavern, in the middle of which is the Altar, perched on a tall thin rock.  That’s where I need to go!

But behind me, and approaching fast, and seemingly with a vengeance, are lots of darting hungry and angry bats…with long shiny teeth!

I quickly decide that if I stay on the ledge, I’m old news…

So, I jump off of the cliff, as far as I can out to the Altar, with my back to down below, and I begin swinging my sword… wildly…

…cutting all of the bats that come too close…

But I’m still falling fast into the dark abyss…

I still keep swinging my sword, and there are almost no bats now. Whew!

This is no ordinary sword in my hand. It was made to swing and seems to come alive with delight when it is used for the purpose of protecting the handler.

I’m still falling with wind, but now I notice that when I point the sword down in the direction in which I am falling, it slows my fall!

Now, I’ve stopped falling and I’m suspended, hovering in the air.

The handy sword starts to glow with light so I can finally see around me…

And, immediately, I do not like what I see…

Inside a large hole in the cliff’s wall are the whites of three eyes honed in on me!

This strange being, which starts to make hissing and snorting noises, sticks its head out of its cave and slowly licks it ugly, sharp chops and thinks it’s going to have me for lunch!

…I ready my glowing sword…

The monster tries to go to my left, and I swing my sword to show that I mean business.

Then it tries to go to my right side, where I also meet it with a deadly and defiant swing!

The monster’s head comes further out of the cave, revealing a very long neck.  Its head and extra long neck, slowly arch above me. Then it slowly comes down on the other side of me, and believe me…I’m waiting for it to get close enough to…

It’s either it…or me!

I notice that the monster looks behind me just for a split second.

“THERES ANOTHER ONE BEHIND ME!” I instinctively deduce.

So, without haste, without looking, and with the quick levitating help of my sword, I nimbly jump up higher to escape the oncoming bite of the second monster (which looks just like the first).

Guess what! The second monster, that thought it could just sneak up on me like that, now reaches out to kill me with one giant chomp, but since I raised up, it followed me up, but went past me…

…and bit the long neck of the first creature!

Yes, a big help to me, but not to the first long-necked monster! It madly reacts and exacts revenge and leads with its teeth to bite the second creature…

They both end up biting and locking on to each other’s mouths!  I do some quick work and sever both of their necks, which fall, heads and all, down below, to who knows where!

But now, what remains of the cut long necks of both monsters coming out of the wall, start to writhe and flail around wildly, almost knocking me over, and banging into the walls.

Now the walls break loose with plenty of watery liquid shooting out. I point my sword up, and dutifully, I am lifted, to get out of the way of the strong sprays, coming from all sides by this time.

“Great!” I thought. “Now, I’ll just ride the water back up to the Altar and finish what I came for!”

But now, the cavern is filling up too fast with rising, sloshing waves of water…

…and something that looks like the Loch Ness Monster on steroids, leaps up out of  the water, with its teethy jaws wide open, and in my direction, and…

TO BE CONTINUED…

May you have many…please, excuse me, I don’t mean to be rude, or not pay attention to you, or anything like that, but, you see, I have to check to see if this sword is really going to save my life!…frozen ice cream is so nice during high noon on the scalding-hot desert…the sun rays coming in through the window blinds carry a secret message that I must decipher, if I am to save anything…smiles!

The Winge Bounce Toothbrushing System Just May Clean Your Teeth Better!

HEY, YOU THERE, HSR, I KNOW THAT’S YOU, JUST WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU’RE GOING THIS TIME OF NIGHT, SLICKLY DRESSED LIKE THAT, WITH THAT TILTED RICH TOP HAT ON YOUR HEAD, AND THAT DIAMOND ENCRUSTED WALKING CANE SWINGING BY YOUR SIDE, AND THAT LONG BLACK VELVET MAGICIAN-LOOKING CAPE…OH, YOU’RE GOING TO ANOTHER RED CARPET PRIMIERE…WELL, THAT EXPLAINS IT, but before you head off in your new chauffer-driven convertible black Bentley, that gorgeous woman over there’s “I wouldn’t miss that luscious Pacific sunset for a million dollars, give or take a few hundred thousand” smile, just wants your autograph and a cute selfie!

Over the last 80 years or so, nine toothbrushing methods named after their inventors have been developed to clean and refreshen the teeth in an effective but non-traumatic fashion.

One of them, in 1999, was conceived and introduced to the public as the Bounce pattern of brushing, by Pacific Rim dentist, Ralph Winge, D.D.S. He also developed two others, but more on that later.

“I needed a version of brushing that would be versatile enough to use in all areas of the mouth, and still be aggressive enough to remove accessable plaque biofilm significantly. But for the method to perform with great efficacy, the brush must be tapped or bounced one-and-a-half to two inches high off of the teeth, with the long axis of the bristles of the brush contacting the teeth at approximate right angles to the tooth surface,” instructs Winge.

He continues, “I have seen the damage to the teeth and gums that the horizontal technique can cause over time, which typically shows up in adult patients, who have used too much pressing forces with the toothbrush over the years, and who may have also used unnecessarily abrasive toothpastes or slurries containing highly frictional particulates,” analyzes Winge.

The Bounce version of toothbrushing is also the fundamental and quantum mechanism behind the new Fireworks manual toothbrushing process.

It is highly recommended that you try all of the nine named techniques to see if you can benefit from them, and who knows, you may come up with a better technique yourself one day!

May you have many…is it true that Modern Man now glows in the dark, because of all the radiation pollution around?… is this the only planet in the universe that has an advanced human civilization? If not, how would a far-away person think about you and me here?...reading is fundamental, and so is the HSR!…smiles!

Make Your Smile “Enamelicious!”

You won’t believe it, however, then again, maybe you would, but the HSR IS ALL HYPED-UP, SUIT CASES PACKED, AND READY TO GO, AND—IT IS ON A MOMENT’S NOTICE—TO CHECK OUT THE TWO MOST ADORABLY MAGNETIC BEACHES IN BRAZIL—THE IPAMENA BEACH AND THE SECRET GERIBA BEACH IN BUZIOS—AND DOCUMENT UP CLOSE, WITH PLENTY OF GROUP SELFIES, THE MANY ABSOLUTELY STUNNING SMILES OF THE BEACH-GOERS AT BOTH PLACES, SO HE MAY UNBIASLY CHOOSE WHICH POPULATION OF BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE IS THE BEST (AND HIS CHOICE CANNOT BE INFLUENCED—BUT EVEN THAT IS NEGOITABLE), and that way, your “honey, can you get my regular at StarBucks to go with these pickles and ice cream” smile will be personally handed gobs and gobs of globally-useful frequent flyer miles!

A wowingly-beautiful smile tastes great!

And shows great taste!

Shiny white enamel beaming and reflecting the incident light off of your social and functional front teeth, with a loudly luminous intensity—that’s what I’m talking about!

A gorgeous grin, with a multiplicity of synergistically-aligned dental gems, can all be yours, or, you might possess a magnificent mouth already. But if you don’t, you can buy one!

Okay, it’s easier said than done, and it may take some time, some treatments, and some insurance benefits, or some straight out cash or credit, and one of the many, forward-leaning dentists with some wizardly skills, but it’s possible…

…and the opportunity is out there just waiting for you to take advantage of it!

Replace some teeth, pop on a few veneers here and there, refreshly whiten the whole set, and then watch the stares begin!…from the many people who see your new “thang” all front and center!

A “Beauty Quadrilateral Zone Of The Face” enhancement like this is recommended at any age, as long as the smiler gets a satisfaction that is worth it…we only live once, right?

And this “sweet spot” goes with any clothing and accessory fashions that you can coordinate, even if you’re wearing nothing but the Emperor’s New Clothes!

So, I implore you all, please frequently sprinkle around your enamelicious smiles, here, there, and all over the place…it will increase the world’s net worth of happiness currency!

May you have many…have you ever seen two people lovingly slow dance in the middle of an energetic and fast-moving crowd?…two thin and tall runway models walking down Rodeo Drive pass by each other, and they both notice that each is wearing the same expensive designer outfit, and can I tell you what breaks out next?...I like dreaming about watching the Sun wake up at the sunrise…smiles!

Your Mouth Is A Swamp!

DON’T TELL THE PARKS AND RECREATION MANAGERS AT THE VENERABLE YELLOWSTONE NATIONAL PARK, THAT UP AT THE TOP OF THE TALLEST TREE, THE HSR IS PLAYING AROUND AND GETTING CUDDLY WITH BALD EAGLE BABY CHICKS IN THEIR NEST, WHILE THEIR PARENTS ARE PERCHED ON A BRANCH RIGHT NEXT TO THEM, OBSERVING AND ALLOWING A TOTAL STRANGER TO GET UPCLOSE TO THEM, but I digress, because your “nothing’s going to stop me from meditating and harmonizing with the ever-present global and galactic “synthwaves”” smile, just loves it when you visit your backyard aviary, filled with different, brightly-feathered birds fluttering here and there every morning!

Yes! You heard me right!

Especially right after you wake up in the morning! Taste it?!

Come on...let's all say it at once...Yuck!

No, but, really, the mouth is the only portal where food, air, and liquids come into our bodies.

But so much more enters into our oral realms…and a lot of it isn’t pretty at all!

A whole shipload of almost bubbling...stuff!

And if we were to break that other stuff down to a microscopic level and see all of the intruders that happen to enter in, and how they look up close and personal, it might be enough to cause a person to gain an upset stomach!

Let’s take a look at some of the stuff that can enter the mouth, through eating, drinking, breathing, and putting our fingers and other things into the mouth (breathing through the nose can really cut down on many larger particulates from reaching the deeper and more vulnerable lung tissues):

-dust, pollution

-aerosolized chemicals

-airborne, food borne, or waterborne bacteria- at least 700 types reside orally

-airborne, food borne, or water borne viruses

-airborne, food borne, or water borne protozoans

-airborne, food borne, or water borne fungi

- airborne, food borne, or water borne prions

-airborne, food borne, or water borne parasites

-processed foods carrying preservatives, dyes, and other chemicals of questionable health promotion value and safety

-ozone, which can, with exposure during prenatal stages, be a factor in promoting oral clefts.  

-the grease that is used to fry foods

-candy and junk food

-and then healthy fruits and vegetables

-I could go on and on… but you get the idea!

So, there is at all times, a war in our mouths between us humans, and the many microbes and mucks that seek to invade and live off of us.

Many of those small bacteriological bad boys like to hang out in the mouth in very specific regions where they thrive well.  But we’re talking millions and millions of them per square inch!

The mouth is an oasis to them: it’s warm, wet, and offers regular food exposure, so these microyucks can fill up and rub their fat bellies!

Yes, you are actually feeding the animals in your own personal oral ecological microzoo!

Sores, infections, dental caries, periodontal disease, and other oral maladies can be the result of the presence of some of them. And bleeding gums can provide some of these agents an entrance way into the rest of the body, possibly damaging many organs far away from the mouth!

Dental plaque is a type of biofilm, and it contains concentrated layers populated by the enemy, that is ever-present and ever-growing in our mouths: we can’t eliminate these colonizing catastorphies, but, alas, we can control them.

There are also free-floating bacteria in our mouths and many of those are swallowed and they adapt to the conditions in the esophagus, stomach, and the intestines, and, yes, many of them are ultimately excreted.

The ultimate daily chore that you can do to “de-swamp-ify” your mouth is to lower the amount of your dental plaque bioburden by flossing, brushing, and rinsing early and often.

In the end, there are so many things that enter our bodies through our mouths all day and every day—intentionally and unintentionally—so, keep those opportunistically ingressing elements as healthy as possible!

May you have many…I think I’ll buy some of that 5 cent lemonade that the little girl is selling on the corner, because it also has ice in it, and I’m hot!...”anything goes” in love and in war, but just don’t let “anything go” into your mouth!...I’m glad that I woke up this morning, and I’m glad that you did, too!…smiles!

Girl Fight! Her New Smile Launched a Million Internet Looks! Part 3.

Your “what you show does not actually have to be real, it just needs to look like it’s real” smile IS JUST SUN BATHING ON A BIG BLANKET AND TAKING IN THE PERFECT, PARTLY CLOUDY BEACH SUNSHINE WHILE WATCHING THE HSR SURF AND ZIG AND ZAG THROUGH THE BREAKING WAVES LIKE A PRO, UNTIL HE HITS A SUBMERGED ROCK, AND FALLS OFF, but don’t worry, because three beautiful life guard ladies rush him ashore, stretch him out, and give him mouth to mouth, even though he’s obviously breathing and not hurt.

Quick Background: it seems that Rona can’t get any respect from the girls at school ever since she got her braces off. Her large space between her upper front teeth made her stand out and look more unique when compared to all of the other girls, and now the guys notice and stare at her, even when the guys are walking with their girlfriends! It seems like she has to watch her back every moment!

While walking to the library, Meg confides in Sampson, her gay friend, that she’s tired of Rona getting all of the new attention from a lot of the guys at the high school, even from her man Curtis, who is the captain of the division champion football team.

“Well, why don’t you just have a talk with Rona, and let her know how you feel. All of this stuff doesn’t have to go the two-fisted route,” consults Sampson.

Meg blurts out, “Sampson, you’re so right! She should understand that women like to feel secure about their man. Oh, but she doesn’t have a boyfriend at this school…yet! And I’ve put a lot of time and effort into my relationship with Curtis!”

Sampson gives Meg a side-eye wink, “I know what you mean by time and effort! You’re too sassy!”

Meg walks through the automatically opening front doors into the library, followed by Sampson and a couple of other people.

“See you later, Sampson,” says Meg.

Sampson offers, “Later Sugar Puss! Be strong!”

As they are about to go their separate ways, they both see Rona standing between two bookshelves turning the pages of a magazine.

Meg, who works in the library, then walks behind the front checkout desk and sets her backpack down. Sampson ventures off into the men’s room.

After a few quiet moments pass in the quiet study hall…

 …Rona starts screaming loudly, because she notices that the tall bookshelves start to lean over and begin to fall her way…

Randy, a calculus geek with a skinny build, who just happens to be standing just down the bookshelf aisle near Rona, jumps into action by tackling and pushing the taller Rona safely out of the way.

The two large shelves make loud booms as they hit the wall and then the floor, with the many books chaotically falling and sliding everywhere.

Both Randy and Rona lift themselves up off of the floor unscathed, dust themselves off, and look at each other.

“Gosh! You just saved my life! And I don’t even know your name,” says Rona.

“Randy…my name’s Randy. Are you okay,” Randy volleys back, and points out, “ your blouse is torn in the front!”

“That’s okay, thanks a lot, Randy. I’m alive and just fine. I can always change it!” says Rona.

Meg drops what she is doing at the desk and runs over to see what the commotion is all about.

After looking around a little, Meg gets a confession from Debbie and Jack, members of the girls and boys basketball teams, respectively. They were just making out between the shelves and the lost their balance, causing the bookcases to tip over.

“Well, thankfully no one was hurt. I’ll call maintenance to get this taken care of,”

a relieved Meg says.

Later, Meg appraises the head librarian, “No one was hurt so there is no legal liability to worry about. I can help with the other guys to properly place the books after class.”

The head librarian says, “Thanks, Megan. I don’t know what I would do without you!”

Rona and Randy walk down the hall after all of that library mess.

“I don’t know how I could ever repay you for saving my life, Randy,” says Rona.

Randy gets a bright idea and says, “ I know how…my robotics class is right here. Let’s just stand in the door way and just give me a quick hug…I’ll be the talk of the class! Getting hugged by the prettiest girl in school! That’s good enough to put on my resume!”

“Sure, I’d love to! After all, you did save my life,” elates Rona, as she bear hugs him tight and gives him a loud lip smack on the cheek. “My hero!”

Randy fixes his glasses and shirt back up and calmly walks into the robotics room. All of the kids there drop their jaws in amazement that skinny old Randy, the weakest guy on the wrestling team, is super close with the school’s hottest girl!

Randy walks slowly toward his seat making sure that he shows the class the side of his cheek where Rona’s lipstick print can be clearly seen!

“I’m never going to wipe this off,” Randy silently promises himself!

Some of the girls in Randy’s class look at him immediately in a different light, and a couple of them look him up and down like they might be planning to see what his attractive “secret” just might be. Meet the new Randy!

After the last classes are over, the students gather in the gym so that the football team and the cheerleaders can have their championship flags hoisted above the rafters and hang from the ceiling for school pride.

Rona is one of the first people there. She sees Meg in the middle of the gym directing people where they should stand.

One of the people above placing a big flag loses his grip!...

…and the heavy flag is right above Meg…

… so Rona shouts, “…

TO BE CONTINUED...

May you have many…the billions of years that have passed, and the billions of years that have yet to come, is infinitely more than our short lifetimes can even start to fathom...Thank You for helping me lift my body out of bed this morning…can you explain to me why the water feels so cool again when I jump back into the swimming pool?…smiles!