I Love Her...And I Even Write Poetry About Her Lovely Smile!...But She Doesn't Even Notice Me!...Part 1.

"Hey, everybody...let's get wet!

I'ma go freestylin', backstrokin', and breaststrokin'

in Sweet Petulandia's "perfect little pool!,"" teases HSR!






And not wanting to miss out on how HSR gets stressed out this time, you and your "no matter how wide the Universe is,

what can be in the Super-Dimensions of the Human Mind's Cranial Vault is even greater!" smile, have to row a boat

upstream, with one paddle, to get to the venue that premieres HSR's latest plight, and,

since it's hot outside in the Northern Hemisphere, and elsewhere,

let's choose a topic to consciously and subconsciously cool you off some, and let's...

go to the snow, freezing temperatures, and HSR!...

last seen in the episode,

"Will Your Mouth Catch The New "Predator Supercavities!?," 

AND THERE, HSR IS HIP-DEEP IN THE WHITE STUFF

AND HE'S LOVING EVERY SECOND OF IT AT THE GLOBE

IN NORDKAPP,

WHICH IS WAY UP AT THE TOP OF THINGS

AND IT'S WHERE HARD ROCKS AND STONE AND SNOW

CLASH FACE TO FACE WITH UNFORGIVING

SUBZERO WATERS,

WHERE EVEN THE CREATURES IN THERE CAN GET 

TOO COLD AND

QUICKLY AND PROBLEMATICALLY DISORIENTED!...

BUT, ANYWAY,

LAST TIME, HSR GOT A JUICY SEND OFF BY A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN

(YOU SHOULD CHECK IT!)

AND HE STARTED HIS PATH SOUTH, TOWARD

LAKSELV, ON A HIGH-TECH SNOWMOBILE!...

AND HSR GETS BRAVE ENOUGH TO TRY SOME TRICKS!

ON HIS WAY

AND HE QUICKLY LEARNS TO STAY ON THE SNOW

AND NOT ON THE WATER...

BUT MOSTLY IT'S JUST QUIET GOING, EXCEPT FOR WHEN HIS MOBILE

GETS LOOSE AND LIGHTLY SCRATCHES HIM UP A BIT

AND

WHEN A MOOSE WANTS TO KNOW IF HSR HAS A

PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY SANDWICH!...

HOWEVER, JUST BEFORE IT GETS DARK

HE PASSES BY A LADY PLAYING IN THE SNOW

AND SHE INVITES HSR TO STAY AT HER PLACE

SO HE WON'T GET FROST-BITE OVER NIGHT

"IF AND ONLY IF YOU GIVE ME A RIDE TO LAKSELV TOMORROW...IS THAT OKAY?"

ASKS THE WOMAN, AS THEY SHARE HOT CHOCOLATE AND TREATS,

AND HSR SAYS "YES, I'D LOVE TO TAKE YOU TO LAKSELV TOMORROW!"...

AND THEY TELL EACH OTHER STORIES AT FIRST

BY THE WARM FIREPLACE, AND

EVENTUALLY,

THEY CALL IT A NIGHT,

BUT THEY HAVE SO MUCH FUN...

THAT WHEN TOMORROW COMES

"WOULD YOU WANT TO JUST RELAX MORE TODAY

AND JUST GO TOMORROW?"

SHE ASKS...

"SURE...LET'S...!" SMILES HSR AS HE STRETCHES...

BUT...

THEN...

THREE MORE DAYS PASS BY...

AND ON THE FOURTH DAY

THEY FINALLY HEAD ON OUT TO LAKSELV

AND ON THE WAY,

THEY PASS BY SOME HARD-CORE SURVIVALISTS

AND SOME KIDS PLAYING

IN THE SNOW AND ANOTHER

TRYING TO MAKE A SNOWMAN

"LAKSELV IS JUST DOWN THIS ROAD,"

SAYS HSR'S FRIEND

AND THEY STOP BY A HOTEL/DINER

TO GRAB A BITE

AND SHE SAYS, "HSR, HERE!"

AND THEY

SLOPPILY KISS IN THE SNOW

AND HSR SAYS, "I HAVE SOMETHING I WANT TO GIVE YOU!"...

SO HE BENDS OVER AND REACHES INTO A BAG...

AND HE TURNS AROUND TO GIVE HER...WAIT!... SHE'S GONE!

JUST LIKE THAT!

"MAN, SHE IS TOO SWEET...BUT...WHAT CAN I DO?" LAMENTS HSR...

"I GUESS I'LL JUST GET A BITE TO EAT!" SAYS HSR, SORT OF FEELING LOW...

SO HE GOES IN THE RESTAURANT AND

AND A WAITRESS ASKS

HSR FOR HIS ORDER...

WHICH REMINDS HSR OF WHAT HE LIKED AS A KID

SO HIS ORDER IS PROCESSED, AND A WAITRESS COMES BY AFTER HIS MEAL AND TELLS HIM, "YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'RE INTO BODY PHYSICS...

"WHY DON'T YOU CHECK OUT THE ANNUAL  JUDO/JUJITSU EVENT DOWN THE STREET?"

"I JUST HAPPEN TO HAVE MY GI...I THINK I WILL...THANKS!," REPLIES HSR...

SO HE WALKS ON OVER TO THE GYM

AND THERE'S A LONG LINE OF FREEZING PEOPLE

BUT A GUY COMES UP TO HIM AND SAYS,

"I SEE YOU HAVE YOUR GI...YOU DON'T HAVE TO WAIT IN LINE!"

SO THEY WALK INTO THE COMBAT PLACE

AND PEOPLE OF ALL AGES ARE GETTING DOWN

SERIOUSLY!

NOW HSR DAYDREAMS BACK TO WHEN HE WAS AT A SUMO TOURNAMENT!

AND THE CROWD WENT EARTHQUAKE CRAZY!...

BUT, HERE... THEY ARE DOING STUFF LIKE THIS!

AND THIS

"GO AHEAD AND GET DRESSED AND WARMED UP!" SAYS THE USHER...

SO, HSR SEES SOME PEOPLE WORKING OUT AND

GETTING SWEATY AND...

MAKING OTHER PEOPLE...

HAVE DOUBTS...LIKE ME!...

OMG! THIS ONE AIN'T PLAYIN'!

"HEY, HANDSOME!...I HOPE I GET MATCHED WITH YOU!," SAYS THIS

AND WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT!

THEY BOTH WERE SELECTED FOR THE NEXT BOUT...

WHICH ENDED IN A TIE

BECAUSE OF HER UNBREAKABLE GUARD!

SO AFTER THE MATCH SHE COMES UP TO HSR AND SAYS,

HELLO THERE, YOU GLADIATOR...

AFTER THE TOURNAMENT, I CAN SHOW YOU HOW TO

GET OUT OF MY GUARD IF YOU WANT?

AND HSR SMLES, "SURE!"

THEN HSR LOOKS AT HIS NEXT OPPONENT,

OMG!...

WHO'S BEEN JUST THRASHING THE COMPETITION ROYALLY...

...AND SHE SETS HER  6 FOOT 7, 310 POUND EYES ON HSR AND HSR GOES

"I THINK I MAY NEED TO MAKE A QUICK RESERVATION

 AT THE NEAREST HOSPITAL!"

                                  Love Toothbrush®

"The more philosophical an item...the greater its cost!"















Well. Hello, World!

It's such a wonderfully-good morning today!

And I get up and get ready

To meet this new 24 hours!

Oh my!

The skies are so beautifully blue

And the birds are

Just happily chirping away

And

I'm enjoying a hot chocolate

And catching up on my newspaper

At a quaint neighborhood cafe

Then all of a sudden

I'm taken by surprise

When you and your friend care-freely saunter on by

And I almost spill my drink

Because there are astonishing sparkles in your eyes

And there are pure enamelite-white coruscations emanating from your smile

Which seem to be calling out loudly to me

And

Before I know it...

My heart 

starts to frantically and romantically race

And my body starts to 

Atomically and molecularly catch a-fire and tingle

And my brain

Shocks, scintillates, and shimmers all of my neurons

Leaving me sensorily overloaded,

But desperately panting for more!

Now, tell me...

...Is this "Love At First Sight!"

Or just a "Hormonal Panic Attack?"

I don't know which

And my cardiologist

Is not around

To diagnose my corazonal palpitations!

Your fascinating elegance startles me...

...almost like a surprising

wake up call!

But you continue walking away on your way...

Not looking back...

I remember that day...like it was today...

Because it was today!

Okay...

So, I recompose myself

And get a change of scenery

I then decide to go to the museum

And I "float" there, thinking of you!

And I see some nice paintings there

Oh no!

There you are, right over there!

Hanging your painting on the wall!

But right then

Your cell phone rings

Then you get up and leave.

Oh, well...

You left before you could put up

Your name by the painting...

So I gaze at it for a while

And notice that you have

An exquisite talent incorporating

Color, Proportion, Perspective

And especially Impact!

I wish I knew your name

That way, I would know

Who I am

Day dreaming about!

Then, I tell my self that I need some fresh air

So, I head on over to the park

OMG!

Here you are...at the park!

And some musicians are jammin' hard

And some people are dancing

Which gives you all the excuse that you need

To show your own rhythmic synergy

Within this moment's moment!

Then, some guy asks you to dance,

But you just keep curving and writhing 

Then you 

Throw him a kiss

Which is more than I ever got, 

Then you, in my slow motion, sweetly sashay away

With many people unwaveringly staring at

The rhythms of your

Body Bounce!...

Like you're some sort of eye magnet or something!

And just like that,

You're gone again...

Another missed opportunity...

But, if I could talk to you now

I'd say or profess something like

Oh, I don't know,

Maybe something like:

"You're Nature's best reflection in the mirror

And the sweetness of sugar cane

Can't come close to yours"

"And maybe...

Roses are red

And violets are blue

Only songs made in heaven

Are worthy of you!"

Yeah!...

That's what I'ma say!

"Your smile's whiter than the

Brightest Cumulonimbus clouds

And more wispy than the

Highest altitude cirrus groups!"

Looking almost like, "Smiles On The Run!"

Well, I think I'll just go and

Sit by the dock of the bay

And watch the time roll away...

And the place looks nice, as usual

But wait!

You...You...

You're leaving on a cruiser...

with some people!

But, for how long?

Now, I guess I won't be bumping into you

Everywhere I go...

But, now, I'm used to seeing you

And your pretty profile

And your Reactionary Artwork

And your

Indescribable self!...

Roses are red

And violets are blue

A man gives all himself

To satisfy you!...

I'd love to!

Even if it is to

Just temporarily quench your

Monstrously voracious thirst

I'll gladly sign up and volunteer

And even give

If I have to!

I guess

I'll have to wait until I see you again...

If I ever do...

No, I don't want to think like that!

Well, anyway...

Deep in my memories,

You'll always be

"Royalty-With-Edge" to me!

May you have many..."Say, Dr. Report--I'm practicing my "Vogue-posing,"

but I'm getting hungry, so 

can you slip me a big piece of your fat meat

...and potatoes...HSR, tell me, which

ballons do you want?..."Here...Hollywood! Catch!...

What? You don't feel like it?

Well, come and

tell me what's on your mind!"...smiles!