Friday, March 29, 2019

This World Is So Cold And Cruel...That... Sometimes...Your Smile...Has To Be...'Slick...And ...Tricky'...Just To Survive!...

"Warning!...All Y'all Knuckleheads Out There...Who Wanna...Mess With Me...And My Stuff!...This Knucklehead...Has...Something...


...'Slick And Tricky'...Fo' Ya!"...



...Pow!...

...How Ya Like Me Now!...






























































"Hollywood!...

Your Smile is

So Smooth and Sweet

that



there are


No Tricks!...Only 'Treats!'"





























































































































"Someone told me

that I

am Addicted to you!

And you know what


I told them?...

I told them


To 'Mind Their Own Business!'"
















































































































"So, Doctor...

You want to

Whiten My Teeth,

So that You Can

Look at My Smile

All Day Long?...


...Okay!"































































"You know what I tell

Someone Who I think is

trying to 'Pull A Fast One'

on me?...


I tell Them


to 'Slow Down!"


























































































"Greetings to you...



from the Rain Forest!...











































































"All of those Women in Your

Waiting Room

are Acting so

'Slick and Tricky'

to be your 'Best Patient!'


But You told me

that 

the Best Way 

to your Heart


is to


Act  and Speak...

the

...Pure Truth!"




















































































"I Love You

This Much...


...Times Two Million!"











































"If I get that

'Gut Instinct'

that

Someone is

Trying to

Cheat Me...

I tell them,


"Thanks...But, No Thanks!""















































You and Your

"I just like seeing

deeper into things

like a


Spy or

a Treasure-Hunter"

Smiles

are

"Whoa!...Happy to find

Free Money

Just


Laying on The Street!































































The Episode for Today,

which is 'Shrouded in Mystery'

is related to you,

syntactically

by 'The Veritable'


'Three Blind Mice!




















































Oh No!...

HSR is on his

Toboggan again!

And that means that



other

People  out there

in the Snow,

better


Watch Out!...

...for their Own Good!



And HSR 

himself,

better 

really

Be Careful...


...Or Else!


But HSR's 

little Doggie

likes the snow, too,

and

knows what it wants,

and doesn't Mind


Rudely taking

control of

HSR's Sleigh!






There you have it,

Ladies and Gentlemen and Non-Binaries!...

Psychologically Speaking,

HSR

suffers from

'Loss Of Control' Issues

almost Everyday!...

...And this New Day is

not going to be any exception!

Because

when we last saw

"Thanks For My Bangin’ New Smile, 


Dentist, Man!…



Now Girls Are

 

Calling Me 



Left 


and Right! Part 4.,"




HSR,

IS TRYING TO

FIGURE HIS WAY OUT

OF A

DARK AND COLD

MEDIEVAL-LOOKING CASTLE,


BY GOING ROOM TO ROOM,

AND

HOPING THAT HE’LL

FINALLY FIND

THE MAIN EXIT,

BUT,

EACH TIME HE ENTERS ONE ROOM,

WHICH INVARIABLY CONTAINS

AN UNEXPECTED

AND MENACING MONSTER...


HE,

SO FAR,

HAS BEEN ABLE TO

EXTRICATE HIMSELF

AND ESCAPE OUT OF

ALL OF THOSE ROOMS,

BUT NO ROOMS YET,

HAVE AN EXIT!

OKAY...SO,

HE KEEP ON GOING INTO

A NEW ROOM

AND FINDING

ANOTHER TYPE OF YUCKY LIVING THING,


WHICH WANTS TO

KEEP HSR,

AND DO UNKNOWABLE

THINGS TO HIM,

SO,

IN THE LATEST ROOM,

WE FIND HSR

TRYING TO GET AWAY

FROM SOMETHING LARGE

THAT SLITHERS

AND DRAGS ITSELF ON THE FLOOR,

BUT THE ROOM

IS DARK,

SO HE CAN’T SEE ANYTHING,

AND HE SLOWLY AND CAREFULLY,

AND BLINDLY,

WALKS,

TOUCHING THE WALL

AS HE GOES ALONG TO FIND,

ANOTHER DOOR TO ESCAPE

TO THE OUTSIDE!...

BUT, NOW,

AS HE

FINALLY FINDS

THE DOORKNOB OF A NEW DOOR,

TO GET OUT OF THIS ROOM,

HE FEELS A

WET AND SLIMY TENTACLE,


SLITHERING UP HIS LEG,

AND UNDER HIS PANTS,

SO

HE SCREAMS LOUDLY

AND 'HIGH-NOTEY'...

LIKE A SOPRANO,

THEN HE

KICKS THE TENTACLE

WITH HIS OTHER FOOT,

BUT,

ANOTHER TENTACLE GRABS THAT OTHER FOOT,

SO NOW,

HE’S IN A 'BIG VAT'

OF TROUBLE,

BUT FORTUNATELY,

HIS HANDS

FINALLY FIND

ANOTHER DOOR AND DOORKNOB

WHICH LEADS,

YES,

TO ANOTHER ROOM!...

SO,

HE TWISTS THE KNOB,

AND THE DOOR SWINGS OPEN,

LETTING IN A LOT OF LIGHT, 


WHICH SCARES

AND MAKES

THE SLITHERING AND TENTACLED MONSTER

WRAPPED AROUND HIS LEGS,

QUICKLY LET GO,

WHICH IS A GOOD THING,

SO,

HSR HIGH STEPS IT

OUT OF THERE

INTO THE NEXT ROOM,

WHICH HAS ENOUGH LIGHT

TO SEEM LIKE

IT’S OUTSIDE,

BUT IT’S NOT,

SO HE’S GLAD,

AT LEAST,

TO GET TENTACLE-FREE,

BUT,

WHAT WAITS FOR HIM

IN THE NEW ROOM NOW

IS

A WOMAN SEATED



AT

A TABLE


WORKING WITH

SOME



CARDS!




AND THAT LADY

REMINDS HSR

OF A HIGH SCHOOL FRIEND HE


ONCE KNEW!...





NOW, SHE LOOKS UP

AND CONCENTRATES ON HSR,

AND SAYS,

"WELCOME VISITOR!...

PICK A CARD...

...ANY CARD!..."



THEN,

HSR THINKS

CAUTIOUSLY

FOR A SECOND OR TWO...

OH MY...

HIS ATTENTION TURNS TO

A CREATURE IN A CORNER NOT TOO

FAR FROM



HIM!...


AND THE SOOTH SAYER LADY

SAYS TO HSR,

"OH, DON'T MIND HIM...



HE'S ONLY HUNGRY!..."


HSR THEN TURNS

HIS ATTENTION

BACK TO THE CARDS...

AND HE CHOOSES ONE

AND

TURNS IT OVER...

NOW, THE WOMAN SAYS,

"YOU JUST

PICKED THE CARD THAT

DIRECTS YOU TO

ENTER DOOR NUMBER TWO!"


AND HSR ASKS ,

"WELL, WHAT IF

I WANT TO GO

THROUGH

DOOR NUMBER ONE?"


"YOU MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO

COME BACK OUT,

AND GO THROUGH DOOR #2!,



SHE ASSURES...


SO, HSR

WALKS SLOWLY

TO

DOOR #2,

AND TRIES TO OPEN THE DOOR,

BUT IT

WON'T BUDGE!...


THEN SUDDENLY,

A TRAP DOOR

OPENS BENEATH HIM

AND


...NOOOOO!...

HE FALLS 

UNTIL HE 



'HITS BOTTOM!'



THEN,

USING SOME OF

HIS RESERVE ENERGY,

HSR GETS UP AND LOOKS

AROUND THE ROOM

AND THERE'S



A WINDOW!...HIP HIP HOORAY!

"MAYBE I CAN ESCAPE

THROUGH THAT WINDOW!"


SO HE MAKES A DASH FOR IT...

BUT THIS THING



JUMPS IN FRONT OF HIM!


NOW,

THE PETRIFIED HSR,

SCREAMS,

AND RUNS TO

ANOTHER VISIBLE

DOOR

AND

SLAMS IT SHUT

AFTER HE GOES THROUGH IT!


AND EVERYTHING'S QUIET...UNTIL...

HE HEARS SOME SLOW,

BUT,

HEAVY

BREATHING BEHIND HIM..

AND HE TURNS AROUND

AND SEES



ONE SCARY DUDE!

...THEN

HSR HEARS

ONE PERSON OFF

TO THE SIDE SAY,

"HEY...

TRY AND


COME THIS WAY!"






























































































































Love Toothbrush®                                     




















































































































"Hollywood!...I can

Hardly Wait to

'Dive In'

to Your



Spaghetti and Meatballs!"


































































....





































"You have to be careful

in This World...

People will try and

Fool you,

and take what's Yours

and

Take Advantage of You!


I'm telling you...

don't


let Them Do that to You!




I mean...some of These People

want to



'Take Your Head Off!"






Word Up!...

...There are Folks out there

that are So Greedy for

what is



Your Stuff!










Some People are


"Out On The Prowl'...

...to get that


'Big Pay Day!'...Courtesy of You!













Watch out for People volunteering,

"I'd Love to Drive You to

The Bank to



pick up your first

Mega Millions Check!










"Shoot!...

At first,

She talked Me into Hating Him!...

And now...


It's just Me...alone!"








And you have to be

careful about

who



you let into

your Home!...

..."Let Me see...

...is there any


'Money under the Mattress!'"


And when You get back Home...

"Honey!...

what happened to the



Money under the Mattress?"






























"Don't You Ever

ask Me



Out on a Date Again!








































Oh Yes!...

And 'Watch Out'

for Knives!


Psychologists say that

The Stabber

really 'Gets Off!'





But,

adding 

Sarcasm

may or may not



'Blunt the Pain!




And since when

do you

have to



'Turn the Other Chest?'




Watch Out!...

Pay Back



Is A Dog!



























"If you give me $10.000 today, I'll



give you Twenty Thousand,

Next Week, Okay?"...



..."My Family Member really needs that Operation!

...Okay...

I'll



Do It!"























"That Guy snatched My Purse,

and he ran across the Street, and

a car



smacked His _____  So Good!



















"How dare you say

that about my

Boyfriend!...

Them's



'Fighting Words!'"


















"I know that You're a Millionaire!...

So What!...



I still Love Your...I mean You!"



















Okay...As soon as she leaves,  that's

when



I'll go In!
















Now,

This next 'Potential Mark'

is going



to

Fight Fire


with Fire...

and

'Throw Back'

a Slick and Tricky Smile...

right back at him!



Just watch!...




"Sir, I have some land

that I can sell to you

for just



$5,000 down!...Right Now!"



"That sounds good...

I'm going to the bank

to get it,

and then I'll



be Right Back!"...(Not!)



















"I'm going on

an



Overseas Business Trip for One Month!...

And I just asked My Best



Friend to take the My Kids to school

and watch the House!...

But

I just don't Trust Her

with My Husband!...


On second thought...

I'm going to



Rescind the Offer!"









"You can Bet that

The Moment that  _________  leaves

I'm



Going to..."



































"Hey, Ol' Buddy, Ol' Pal!...

Can I use your



Brand New

Lamborghini


to drop off some packages?"




"Really?...

Let me see,

...it does need to be

driven fast

to clean out the

Carburator!...

...I'll see if I

can

Find the Keys!"...



...(Not!)...

























"You can trust Me...

just ask



my Friends!"



But one 'Friend'

says...



'Oh Boy!'






















"What!...You found some

Buried Treasure there?

Sure!...

I'll



Keep it a Secret!"






























"Now where does he



'Keep His Stash?"







Some Things are

Accidents


And 

Other Things

are


Intentional!




























"Aww, Man,



Someone 

Broke into

The Warehouse

and Stole all of Our Stock!"


"Hey...You're


Joshin' Me, right?"






"No Man...



I'm Not!"






























"He can go!...

I never really



Loved Him Anyway!"


























"Wait!...

What are they



Talking about in there?"

































"This is Pay Back...

...for...



Elementary School!"






















"You say that there was

100 Dollars in there?...

Well...



I only saw Ten!"

































"You just met Me...and...

You want Me

To go to Switzerland

With You?...

Well...



...Okay!"






























"My Car just Broke Down...

...How am I




ever going to

make it to

the Bank to

drop off This Cash

in Time?"





"Lady!...

I'd be


'Glad To Help You!"




Woman...Your Problem is that

you're


giving up

too information 

to people

You don't even know!

Use Caution 

and

Think a little Deeper, Okay!


























"You just think You're



Somebody Special,

Don't You!"





















"No, I didn't take it!....


What makes you think that


I Took It?"





























Yes...

A lot of those Swindlers 

are



going to get

Their

'Just

and


Hot...Desserts!'










Believe Me!...

Sometimes You

have to tell 'Those People'

how You Feel

in


'Plain, In-Your-Face English!


















However,

when you find

someone that

You can see

Eye to Eye with


...Great!



















So Love Yourself...

...like I Love Myself!

...and 'Be Safe' Out There

in that

'Cold and Cruel World!'...

Oh!...and I'm off

to



My Appointments!...

...So...

...On The Further...Sweets!..."



















































































































































































May you have many...



..."Hi, HSR...

You want to know


what I did in France

Last Week?...

Okay...

Well, first...


Blah blah blah"...



..."I'm

So Happy

that

I am Alive Today!


...And that I can 

Walk and Talk

and 

All of the Rest!


I really feel Super!


But This World

is not 

all around,

a Happy Place!


I think I'll 



help Someone

have a Better Day!"...




..."Doctor Report!...

I'm so glad that you

could make it


to this

'Meditation And Good Karma' Retreat

in the Wilderness

This Week!


Ever since we were Classmates

in Dental School,

I could tell that you were more

'Enhanced and Sensitive'

than all of the 

Other Students!


And now,

Seven Years after Our Graduation,

what with 

all of the Adventures that you go through...

You should share your Stories,

and



Write a Blog!...I'll help if you like!..."...





..."Forget about what

happened Last Time!...

This Time...



We come in Peace!"...


...smiles!


















































































"So, HSR...

You want to


'March To The Beat

of

My Drummer?"...










































































"Yeah, Baby!...I got this 

Muscle 

from just...


Water, Fruits, and Vegetables!










































































































Meanwhile...Back At The Place Where 

Sometimes...

...It's So Beautiful...

...That It Seems Like


Heaven, 

Right Here On Earth!
































































































































































Dental Hygiene Wars!






















































































































































"Hi!...I'm the Bacterium

tyrannosaurus microsmallum,

and

I traded DNA Genes with a

'robobacterium blasthemup!'...

Now,

for the Next 

Hygienist I see,

it's gonna be


'Real Curtains, Baby!"
















"OMGosh!...

Is that the New Bacterial Species

coming over the

Marginal Ridge right now?...

The dreaded,

tyrannosaurus microsmallum?...

Sheeeeee!

I'm


'Calling for Back Up!"
























"I'm here 

all alone

in this Deep and

Dark Sulcus!...

Wait!...Is that

Something... 

calling out My Name?...


I'm keeping 

My Eyes Peeled...

and My Scaler,

'Super Ready!'"


























"My Comrades!

I just 

had a 

'Big Scrap' 

with a

tyrannosaurus microsmallum!...

...Please...I warn You!...


...Wear Double or Triple

Protection!"































"All I can say

about this

Person's

'Food-Filled, Dirty Mouth'...

...is...



...'So Many Gums And Teeth!...


...So Little Time!'"





































This One

better not Break


...Like The Last One!"







































"Hey, Wait!...You Guys!...

Do these Things We're After...


Shoot Back?"




























"Hi, Ladies...I'm New 

to The Team here!


Are there any Battle Pointers 

that You can 

Give Me?





"The only Thing that We 

can say 

is that

We Stick Together

All The Time!

And we have 

Each other's Backs!...

Tell us...



Do You Know Your Way

around the Maxilla

and Mandible?'




"Sort of!

...I'm Fresh out 

The 


Hygiene Academy!"








"Well,

since you are New...


We suggest that for 

Everyone's

Best Protection

in the Battlefield..."









"...It might be 

Best to Stay


in a 

'Tightly-Sandwiched Formation'

Between Us!"












"Well, if that's 

what it takes...

I salute


"Yes, Sirs1...

...I mean...

Yes, Mams!"...














































































































































































































While you were Reading...

...I Prepared

for You a

Tasty


'Knuckle Souffle!'...Here!...

'Wassa Matta!'...Fist Got Your Tongue?"




























































































































































































































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