Friday, July 27, 2018

...I'm A Tooth Fairy!...And These Are My Tales!...Part 1....

"Hi...You like the way that I'm "Backin' That Thang Up?"...I'm busy right now...but my Associates below will


Help You!"









                                                                       



































"HSR!....

This always shocks

me more than

it shocks you!...and...


that's why I

Keep Coming Back!"























"Come on in...



The water's fine!"...












































Ladies!...

...from any Walk of Life,

from Pilots,


to Miners,


to "High Tea Ladies,"





to Dangerous


Black Belts!...

Hollywood's here!!"










































...Dr. Report,

I'm comparing notes

from Our Time Last Time,



and Our Time this time...


...and nothing's changed!"































Whew!...

You and your

"I love Cold Air


Conditioning

on a


 Hot Day outside!"

smiles

are

just Lovin' the Babes

on


Baywatch!








































Today's Cyber Link to Reality

is brought to you by...

a Pretty Lady who

...oh, oh...

let's


take the tape off!...

...who knows many Languages and


likes to talk!










































And...

since it's Hot Outside...

Let's Go Skiing In The Cold!...Yeah!...


Now,

HSR likes the tricks that the

Pros can do...


but him...


there "otta" be a law!...

...against him


using his


Hospital Insurance too much!...

especially in the 

places where he likes...

which are the...


Avalanche-Prone Areas!



See, HSR is always,

subconsciously chasing

Danger...even if he doesn't

realize it!

Don't believe me?

Just check out

"Teeth Jam" Or "Toe Jam"...Which Is Worse?...Part 2."

and

before that,

"She Has A "Summa Cum Laude" Smile!,"

where HSR is on break,

OF COURSE,

FROM

THAT GIANT

DENTAL SCHOOL

ON THE WEST COAST

  U. S. C.


SCHOOL OF DENTISTRY!...AND

HE IS NOW

VISITING THAT

LOVELY


DECHI BEACH,

BY THE HOOK OF


HOLLAND! (A)...

AND HSR MEETS BENTHE

AT AN OUTDOOR CAFE...


SO, THEY TALK A LITTLE 

AND HE TELLS HER 

THAT HE WANTS TO 

"BIKE 

ALL THE WAY 

TO ROTTERDAM!"

SO, 

SHE TELLS HIM WHERE A BIKE SHOP IS....

THEN, 

SHE ASKS HSR, 

"DO YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?"
  

"YOU VOLUNTEERING?" 

HE ASKS...

MAKING HER LAUGH A LITTLE...

"WELL, HSR,

SINCE

YOU'RE NEW TO MY COUNTRY,

I WANT TO..."

THEN 

BENTHE 

WALKS UP TO

HSR AND PLANTS 


A

ROMANTIC "FAT ONE"

ON HIS CHEEK!

AND

SHE SMILES,

"COME BACK... I'LL SHOW YOU AROUND!

THEN,

SHE GIVES "THE WINK AND THE


"POINT!"...MAKING HSR



BLUSH A LITTLE!...

SO,

HSR STARTS WALKING DOWN


THE STREET

AND

HE PASSES BY

SOME FRIENDLY



BIKE PEOPLE

ON THE


WAY

TO THE BIKE SHOP, AND

ON THE WAY,

HE MEETS A LADY

THAT LIKES TO WALK

AND



TALK

ABOUT TIRE PRESSURES

AND

BRAKING DISTANCES

AND

THAT IT'S

NOT GOOD TO ALWAYS

GO



ALL OUT...AND...

THAT SHE

WANTS TO MEET HSR

AT THE SAME PLACE



TOMORROW!...


NOW,

HSR THINKS,

"PEOPLE AROUND HERE

ARE REALLY

"CARBON-FOOTPRINT CONSCIOUS,"


AS THEY GO ON


ABOUT THEIR DAY!" THINKS HSR...

NOW,

HE GETS TO A BIKE SHOP


AND WALKS INSIDE...

"HELLO...MAY WE HELP YOU?"

SMILES THIS



LADY...

AND HSR RESPONDS,

"HI THERE...

I JUST NEED A BIKE

TO TRAVEL THE COUNTRYSIDE!"

"WELL," SHE SAYS,

WE HAVE AN

ELECTRIC ONE

THAT CAN HAUL MAJOR


"A!""

"NAW," SAYS HSR, 

" I JUST WANT A PLAIN ONE FOR NOW."

"OKAY!"

THEN THE LADY SAYS, 

"WELL, 

JUST GO ON IN THE BACK...

...KEESHA

WILL HELP YOU."

"THANK YOU," HE SAYS...

NOW, 

HE WALKS BACK 

AND SEES KEESHA.


"HI THERE, MISS KEESHA!," SAYS HSR...

"I CAN TELL 

RIGHT OFF THE BAT THAT 

YOU'RE AMERICAN!" SAYS KEESHA, 

"AND SOME OF THESE LADIES 

HERE ARE 

GONNA SNACTH YOU UP, 

AND 

BLOW YOUR MIND, 

IF YOU 

DON'T WATCH IT, BOY!"

"THANKS FOR THE WARNING, KEESH!" 

GRINS HSR...

"YOU JUST MET ME AND 

YOU'RE ALREADY 

CALLING ME "KEESH!...

YOU SURE ARE 

TAKING SOME LIBERTIES!" 

LAUGHS KEESHA...

...

OKAY, 

SO, HSR GETS A GOOD, 

STURDY BIKE!...

NOW, 

AS HE 


RIDES, HE THINKS ABOUT

TIMES PAST WHEN HE HAD A BIKE LIKE


PEE WEE HERMAN!

AND 

WHILE TRAVELING EAST, 

HE GIVES A HIGH


FIVE 

TO A 

FELLOW BIKER!

AND 

HE REMEMBERS 

A SCENE FROM ONE


OLD MOVIE AND 


ANOTHER!...

SO, 

HSR PASSES SOME PEOPLE


 ON THE ROAD


AND

ONE LADY ASKS,

"I HAVE SOME WINE AND CHEESE,


AND A BLANKET...YOU GAME?"

AND HSR, SAYS,

"SURE!"

SO, 

THEY SIT AND TALK 

AND LAUGH A BIT,

PLUS SOME OTHER STUFF,

THEN THEY SAY "BYE!"

AND SOON,

HE PASSES AN 


AIRPORT!...

AND

FARTHER ALONG,

WOW!...

IT'S

THE

THEEPOT!


AND, 

AS IT GETS DARKER,

THERE'S OTHER

SPECTACULAR STUFF

LIKE THIS


AND THIS


HOWEVER,

NOW, 

WITH HIS NIGHT LIGHT ON


HSR FINDS HIMSELF 

A LITTLE 

LOST

AND 

REAL TIRED AND 

TUCKERED OUT 

AND 

HE'S HERE!...


...BY SOME RED LIGHTS!

"WHERE AM I?" 

HSR ASKS HIMSELF!...

THEN,

ALL OF A SUDDEN,

A WOMAN SAYS,

"HEY, YOUNG MAN...

THERE IS AN 

EMERGENCY ON THE STREETS!


BRING YOUR BIKE IN HERE,

AND 

COME WITH ME 

TO GET OFF 

OF THE STREETS!"

NOW, 

HSR SAYS, 

"AN EMERGENCY?...

WELL, 

THAT'S VERY NICE OF YOU...

TO OFFER SHELTER!

...I THINK I'LL 

TAKE YOU UP 

ON THAT OFFER!"

...

"COME ON IN," SHE SAYS, 

"I'M NOT SURE WHAT KIND OF EMERGENCY IT IS 

BUT, 

JUST TO BE SAFE, 

IT'S BEST TO BE INSIDE!"

SO,

HSR WALKS IN AND 

LOOKS AROUND THE PLACE,

A LITTLE

AND HE SEES SOME


 WOMEN...

AND THE LADY WHO LET HIM IN SAYS,

"IF YOU WANT TO,

HAVE A SEAT 

OVER THERE FOR A MINUTE!"

"OKAY," 

SAYS HSR, 

AS HE TAKES A SEAT...

THEN,

HE MOVES A LITTLE

CLOSER TO THE WINDOW,

JUST TO GET AN INNOCENT LOOK OUTSIDE!


THEN, 

ALL OF A SUDDEN,

SOME WOMEN ON THE STREET 

START TO GATHER AROUND 

HIS "WINDOW!"...

NOW,

HSR CAN HEAR SOME OF THEM SAY,

"I WANT HIM!," 

AS THEY POINT 

AND GIGGLE TO EACH OTHER

THEN, 

A NUMBER OF THEM 

WALK FROM THE WINDOW,

AND

THEY SEEM TO BE 

GOING TO THE FRONT DOOR 

OF THIS PLACE!

AND, 

IN A MINUTE OR TWO,

HSR CAN HERE THE PEOPLE SPEAK 

AT THE FRONT DESK,

"WE WANT TO PAY 

FOR THAT GUY IN THE WINDOW...

...HERE'S THE CASH!

AND A LADY SAYS, 

NONE OF THE GUYS 

ARE WORKING NOW!"

AND THE WOMEN SHOUT BACK TO HER, 

"WE SAW HIM...

...AND HE'S JUST THE ONE 

WE'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR!

HERE'S THE MONEY...

PLEASE GIVE HIM TO US!"

...

NOW,

HSR IS FINALLY 

PUTTING TWO AND TWO TOGETHER, AND

HE THINKS TO HISSELF,

"AWW, MAN...I'M IN A 

"GOOD LOVE MARKETPLACE!...AND 

THOSE WOMEN 

COMING FOR ME ARE

GONNA TAKE OUT SOME OF THEIR

FANTASIES, AND FETISHES

OUT ON ME!"

...

SO NOW,

HSR, 

WALKS PAST AN OPEN DOOR 

AND SEES A LADY


AND SHE SAYS TO HIM,

"COME AND STAY A WHILE, HANDSOME!"

 BUT

HE KEEPS WALKING...

NOW, 

HE
SEES AN OPEN DOOR,

AND HE DECIDES TO 

GO INTO THAT ROOM...

...SO,

HE TIPTOES INSIDE,

AND

HE'S NOT SURPRISED TO SEE ...

...A BED!

SO,

HE DECIDES TO 

GET UNDER THE BED 

AND HIDE!


AND

JUST AS HE 

MAKES IT UNDER THERE,

HE HEARS TWO PEOPLE 

COME IN THE ROOM AND 

JUMP ON THE BED!

.....

AND AFTER SOME

EXTENDED MOMENTS OF PASSION,

AND 

FEELING THE ROOM SHAKE 

WITH

"EARTHQUAKES OF AMOUR!"...

...THINGS SETTLE DOWN, AND

THE TWO PEOPLE LEAVE....

"NOW'S MY CHANCE 

TO 

GET OUT OF HERE!,

" THINKS HSR...

SO, 

HE GETS FROM UNDER THE BED,

AND STANDS UP, 

THEN 

WALKS TO THE DOOR 

AND OPENS IT

A LITTLE 

AND STICKS HIS HEAD OUT TO SEE


DOWN THE HALL...

BUT...

OH NO!

....

"THERE HE IS," THOSE HUNGRY WOMEN SHOUT

AND POINT TO HIM...

"LET'S GET HIM!"

SO, 

HSR RUNS BACK INTO THE ROOM

BUT

HE CAN'T SHUT THE DOOR!

NOW, 

THE WOMEN BARGE IN,

AND THIS ONE SAYS,

"DON'T WORRY, BABY...

I JUST


WANT TO WATCH!"

THEN,

THIS LADY SAYS, 

"I JUST NEED TO 


HOLD HANDS 

AND HUG!"

AND NOW...

THIS ONE SAYS,


" I JUST WANT MY MONEY'S WORTH!"


AND LASTLY,

THIS ONE GRINS,

"RIGHT NOW,

I JUST WANT TO LIVE


ONE "POP" AT A TIME!"

...

NOW...

A BIG PART OF 

HSR IS 


SO 

VERY 

FRIGHTENED!

BUT, 

A TINY 

YET SIGNIFICANT  

PART OF HIM

THINKS




"YEAH, BABY!"

...

NOW...

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT

IN THAT ROOM...

IS SO MUCH

OF A BLUR...

BUT...

THE NEXT MORNING...

...ALTHOUGH BEING

A LITTLE EMBARRASSED...

HSR STILL GETS HIMSELF

READY TO GO,

AND

AS HE LEAVES ON HIS BIKE,

THIS LADY SAYS,


"AFTER ONE SHOT OF WHISKY,

YOUNG MAN,

YOU WERE "TEARING IT UP!"...,

AND YOU

MADE MORE MONEY

THAN EVER

FOR THIS PLACE!

YOU NEED TO COME BACK

SOON AND GET

YOUR

PROFIT ON,

OKAY!"

"I'LL THINK ABOUT IT!" SAYS HSR,

AS HE GETS ON HIS

BIKE AND RIDES TO THE EAST...

BUT NOW...

HE HAS A NEW FOUND

FAT WAD OF CASH

IN HIS FRONT POCKET,

AS HIS CUT

FROM THE "FESTIVITIES"

FROM THE NIGHT BEFORE!

SO HE STOPS BY A DINER


TO GRAB A BITE!...

AND THE PLACE LOOKS

OKAY, WITH


VARIOUS CLIENTELE...


"GOOD DAY, SIR!...


...LUNCH FOR ONE?"

AND HSR SAYS,

"YES, PLEASE!"

SO HE TAKES A SEAT...

AND HSR SEEMS TO ALREADY,

HAVE 


AN ADMIRER!

SO, HE WOLFS DOWN

THE FOOD AS IF

HE HASN'T EATEN

FOR A WHILE,

THEN HE PAYS AND

MAKES OUT

ON THE ROAD AGAIN

AND HE'S ON HIGHWAY A20

AND HE PASSES BY


A WINDMILL 

AND...

WOW!...SOME


REALLY BIG BULB FARMS!

AND HSR BIKES PAST SOME


FRIENDLY


KIDS AND A NICE


COUPLE!

"SIR," SAYS THIS LADY, "YOU


REMIND ME OF A GOOD FRIEND!...

PLEASE RIDE SAFELY ON YOUR BIKE, OKAY...PLEASE!"

"WHY THANK YOU, MISS!...

...THANKS FOR YOUR CARING, AND

I'LL TRY TO BE 

REAL SAFE!"

AND SO HE 


RIDES ON...


"WHAT'S THAT?

A ROBOT!"


SAYS HSR!


"SPEAKING OF BICYCLES...

I LIKE THE 


"BICYCLE KICK!" SMILES HSR...

THEN 

FOR A MINUTE OR TWO 

HE COASTS WITH A

GUY ON A 


STRANGE ONE!...

"THIS IS QUITE THE PLACE,"

SMILES HSR,

AS HE REMEMBERS TO


KEEP HIS EYES ON 

THE ROAD!...


THEN THIS LADY 

MOTIONS TO HSR BY THE 

SIDE OF THE ROAD,

AND SHE ASKS,


"HI THERE...DO YOU HAPPEN TO

KNOW ENGLISH?"

AND HSR BLURTS OUT,

"SURE DO!...WHAT'S UP?"




AND SHE RESPONDS,

I'M HAVING A 

"LEARN MORE ENGLISH"

MEETING AT MY PLACE


...WOULD YOU LIKE TO 

GIVE YOUR INPUT?"


THERE WILL BE DINNER

AND A LITTLE WINE!"

"SOUNDS GREAT!" HE SAYS...

SO THEY GET THERE

AND THE PLACE IS LIVELY!


AND AFTER THE MEETING,

THERE'S A DANCE!

AND THIS LADY

COMES UP TO

HSR AND SAYS


"HI HANDSOME !...

I SPENT SOME TIME IN

AMERICA!...


BUT,

I LIKE IT HERE BETTER!

...SO WHAT ARE YOU


DOING AFTER THE PARTY?"

"I'M NOT SURE," SAYS

HSR...

"WELL," SHE SAYS,

WE'RE HAVING A


"SLEEP OVER" TONIGHT

AND



YOU'RE INVITED!"

AND IMMEDIATELY

HSR HAS FEELINGS

LIKE THIS...


AND...

LIKE


THIS!

WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE,

EVEN IN AMSTERDAM...

"WHEN IT RAINS...IT POURS!"










































Love Toothbrush®                                           














































"The Sun's so hot that...


now I can

believe that stuff about

"Global Warming!""
















































Hello, there!

My name is

Dentalia Fictionala!...

and I am a...



Tooth Fairy!...

...or at least one of them!

And I have a special job where,

when called upon,

I secretly exchange

a Child's tooth that has

otherwise fallen out,


for something of Real



or Sentimental,



or Cultural, or may be even After Life


 value!




I usually am requested

by a complying Parent to bring

Momentos


of one


kind


or


another! And 


sometimes I get notes


of Appreciation from


Happy Kids!

But, 

Nowadays,

especially in Western Countries,

a number of kids

don't want the


Small Money stuff...

...they go for the


big, bigger,


and 

biggest

Options!

But, 

those expenses are totally

funded by the 

"All Mighty and

Deep-Pocketed" 

Parents!


So when a child's tooth falls out


unless I'm 

Overloaded with Clients

I,

sometimes with Associates,


retrieve a tooth


and replace it with  

the requested item(s)!


Some people,

however, 

have tried to fool me

with


Garlic!

That is not nice, People!

and it's bad Karma 

to trick the 

Tooth Fairy!

There are Karma Fairies 

that may try to


"Rebalance The Imbalanced Equation!"



Now, there is room

for all Tooth Fairies...

with some having

different


features and 


attributes


and all,

but,

and I repeat,

we do not take out


any teeth!...

...no matter


how loose teeth are!

...We do not control that process!



And we don't check for any


Dental Health Signs, either!




And, 

you can best believe that

there is a 

story behind each and every


Lost Baby Tooth!

Yes!...some kids 

have no problem


telling you about it...

...all day!





Now, 

I do remind parents 

to leave the 

tooth near 

the edge of the pillow...

so if a child starts

to wake up,


I might have to use 

some means,

like Fairy Dust...


for me to remain undetectable!


Now, 

I at least go over 

all requests for my services,

but when people want me for 

things other

than Baby Tooth Stuff,

like this guy


I almost invariably decline!

I have enough business,

so I can't 

fool around,

except on vacations!

Then, 

I hang out with my


BFF (Best Fairy Forever)!...

Or I just enjoy

all of the 

Natural Things 


in Nature!



I do have a Sister that 


covers many parts of 

Southern Europe,

and 

another one that

frequents


the North and South Pole Areas!

And there's even one that

operates during


Halloween Time Tooth Loss!



And...for sure...during the Daylight

I need to get my


Beauty Rest!


...I need to stay on top

of My Game!...

because

"A Tooth Fairy's Job


Is Never Done!"...



So, now,

if you'll please excuse me...



I'm off to Work!...




















































May you have many...


...I'm sort of like a Tooth Fairy,

but,


I deal in Love...


So I guess that I'm a

Love Fairy!


And my job is

harder than many

people think!


Because some people want love,

where they really don't

stand a chance of getting it!


And others want Love from someone else,

when all they really need

is for them to start

Loving themselves!



So,

when I initiate the "Start Of Love Sequences,"



I need to see the right justifications,

because

on the Coin, Love is on

one side,



and "You Know What" is on the other!...




..."Hollywood just got me this

Kimono, but


He hasn't given it to me yet, and

he doesn't

know that I have it!


OMGosh...is that him?


I've got to hide!"...





..."Whoa!

You have been my only

Coffee Customer today!

...four times!


And I want to offer you a 

Thank You!


Would you like "Something Sweet?"...



..."So HSR...

what did you do



next on those Stormy Seas?"...


...smiles!

























"Doctor Report!

All of my friends said

"Thanks" for

coming to the Party!


And they Loved the way 

you wore

that Lamp Shade

as a hat!



If we throw

another Party...



...will you be the

"Life"

of it again?"



































"One Era finishes...and

another Era starts!

...Then repeat!...


Let's get out of here!"














































































"There HSR is 

in the 

"Cool Dip Pool!"...

I think that

I'll go on over

and


give his shivering self...

a towel!"


































"Doctor Report!...

...Do you make Deals?"

And Doctor Report says,


"Left and Right!"

















































































"Good Morning, Agent HSR!...

I have come across some

important intelligence...

...Rogue Agents from

Blogostovia are on their way here

for

a Mission that seems to be

"Shady!"

...Agent Report!...


Why are you Smiling about that?"



































"Hello, Young Lady!

Thanks for trying on the outfit

for my Fashion Show!


How does it feel on you?"








"There's ample room for 

all of my parts!...

And 


I feel freer that ever before!

There's a lightness to

me and 


my every move!

Sir, did you design this?"






"No, but, 

you bring out a simplicity

and a sophistication

that


very few models 

seem to have!

It's refreshing to see a 

Non-Mannequin!"








"Thank you, Sir!...

This Summer Show coming up,

I hear,

will be


the Biggest Ever!

May I ask how I will be paid for my


Modeling Services?"








"Yes...


you may ask!"




















































"HSR is walking this way now!...


And when he comes a little closer,


I'm going to jump out and  say,

"Boo!"...


And then he'll act scared,

and see me


and hug me real tight...

just like last time!"
















































"A third of a millimeter lower...

with my scaler...

...that's it!...


...Perfect!"
































































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