Armed with a super-thick down feather jacket, a tall Thermos
flask full of fresh, hot, and black vapors-rising expresso...
and a thickly-woven thermal cap
straight from J Crew, THE HSR, ON A CRISPY-COLD STARRY NIGHT, ON A FAR-AWAY,
CITY-LIGHTS-FREE MOUNTAIN TOP, POINTS ITS MEADE LX200 CATADIOPTRIC TELESCOPE,
AND ITS ALL-ALUMINUM, INFRARED SPECTRAL, 40 CM DIAMETER WISE TELESKY WATCHER
TOWARD YOUR SPECIFIC ZODIAC CONSTELLATION, to catch any shooting stars, dark
matter, or UFOs...
...operating solely on the red-shifted X-ray paradigm, trying to
get next to your “there really are self-therapeutic benefits realized when
people “just go shopping”” smile!
“All baby birds, and us humans, eventually learn that…we better
learn how to fly!”
Quick Background: how
does this dentist do it?! He escapes multiple dangers just by the skin on his
teeth, one right after the other! He was supposed to finish his mission at the
top of a special mountain…the one that just blew up into a billion pieces…and
so far, this continuous and deadly roller coaster of a ride shows no sign of
slowing down!
Whether the big prehistoric looking birds know it or not,
they just saved my life by grabbing me and flying off of that doomed, exploding mountain.
It seems like I have spent a long time trying to complete this mission of
sacrificing this little doggone baby tooth…it doesn’t even have a root on it!
Right now, I’m watching one of the friendly big birds...
...fall
from the sky after taking out four of the six long-dagger-beaked assassin birds.
Two asassin birds are left and they are fixing to dive down on us and take
me, and the two savior birds out for good.
Suddenly, one of the diving Black Birds hits and buries its
deadly beak deep into the neck of the other bird on my team.
They both go down together into the darkening gray abyss.
The bird that's carrying me, and I, are now the only ones left.
I look up, trying to find the last bad bird.
My sword is really warming up now, like it wants not to be
left out of the fight.
Frantically looking above, I finally see the last feathered kamikaze zoom
out of a cloud coming super fast at us.
To my surprise, the sword jumps out of my hand, rises up,
and quickly positions itself to meet the bird.
The killing flyer doesn’t expect this, but the sword sets its blade
to vertically slice the bird and its beak exactly in two down the middle.
One half flies down harmlessly into that netherworld below.
But the other half of that bird's body, in a tricky way, contorts itself, and hits the bird that is carrying me
right in the eye, immediately killing it.
My sword flies off far away from me, turning end over end, partly
pulled by gravity, and partly directed by its own intelligent doing, I think, until I
can no longer see it through the thick cloud soup.
The dead bird that was carrying me loses its grip on me, and
falls down faster than I do.
So now, I’m falling…into darkness…I don’t even know if
there’s a bottom to all of this…but I just have my spears, baby tooth pendant,
and the mortar and pestle…
And speaking of the mortar and pestle, they start to heat up
in my pocket, so much so that I must take them out.
They are too hot now to hold them, so I must let them go!
I see them get white hot through the cloudy fog as they
separate from me.
Now, this has to be the absolutely finest mess I have gotten
myself into so far…
I’m in an unending free fall, in pitch-black darkness, and
my gravity speed is quickly getting faster…
…so fast that the baby tooth pendant flies off of my neck,
and disappears into the mean darkness…
Now there really is nothing left for me to live for…but I tell
myself that I shall go out with a big fight…so I grab one of the spears I have
left, and stretch it out so I can at least stabilize my speeding and spinning fall.
In front of me, I now see a coalescing glow in the shape of a giant face
that travels downward as fast as I do.
It starts to speak above the noise of
the wind from my fall… “Ahh, the tooth sayer…I now have the mortar, pestle and baby
tooth in my possession, all without having to touch you to get it!”
This big ghost-like, silhouette-creature, which seems to
solidify more into actual matter before my eyes, continues,
“This is the only
way I could have gotten them from you. And now that I have them, I will waste
no time in completing the pulverization process!”
I shout out, “Why are you doing this? What’s in it for you?”
The apparitional light answers back, “I have accumulated the
powers of the other 19 baby teeth…this is the last one in the set of twenty…and
the most important one! I’ve waited a million years just for these precious
seconds…and you shall be the one to witness the beginning of my new reign of
power that will last for eons!”
I ask, knowing that this force is up to no good, what he
plans to do with its new powers.
It responds as it continues to turn more into a glowing human-monster form, “I will control all of the forces of Nature and all of the fiery suns,
yet I will let you and Mankind live and spread throughout the universe to
fulfill my prophecy of conquering and unifying all of life throughout the
stars! No one, and no thing. will be able to contest my every desire! You’ll
see!...Right now!”
…all of this is happening as our speeds increase in this eeriest
of fantasy free falls!...
With the baby tooth inside the mortar in one hand, and the
pestle in the other, the altering ghost—who must now completely turn into flesh
and blood,
so the transmutation can properly take place—raises his hand to
start the fate of his ultimate plans!
Just as he begins to bring down the pestle to strike the tooth in the
mortar…
…I sling the spear I hold as fast as I can…
…and it…
TO BE CONTINUED…
May you have many…I misplaced my keys, and do you know where
I found them: right where I left them!...you know, we do not have to wait until
Christmas to get into a giving mood!...I know why there are so many sugary
products at the check-out stands in the supermarkets!…smiles!