"Real Lover!"
"I volunteer, Hollywood!...I'll
take it...and give it...like a Real Lover!...
...under two conditions!
The first, it has to be with you...
and the second...
...I'll think of that later!"
"I Love Doctor Winge, the Dentist, for
making the Love Toothbrush!
And because of that, he
started writing this Dental Adventure and Romance Blog!
He's the only Dentist
who has risen to this level of
literary sophistication and
he shares it with us weekly!
This Blog gets about 6 million
hits a year!
Now,
he's real, and I'm Cyber!
But,
when I see his Creation...
that Cyberboy, you know...
the "homo cybergraphicus," HSR,
after the show...
he'll know what hit him!"
I Love this blog, too!
And I love HSR!
He knows how to treat women!
But...more specifically...
he knows how to
Love Me!"
The Cyber World and Human Dreams
have many things in common!
Both are constructs of the "Reaching Mind!"
And both can give
Direction and Intensity!
Oh...and also...
you don't need
"Dr. Report!
I'm all dressed up and ready. to go..
Now,
let's just go inside and
"Lounge Around!"
"You Lucky Girl!
Well, Greetings Reader!...
I'm "The Official Bouncer and Let-er In-er!" for
Today's Blog!
All Readers must go through me
to get inside!
And...you!...reading this right now...
you can
come and slide (ouch!) on in!
"I have this new perfume called.
He Comes A-Runnin'!"
And
I just put some on...
now...
here he comes...
"Hi there, Irresistible!""
"Hey there!...
How's my Sugar Man?
You say that you got all the Sugar I need?
Ha!...
Well...
"Hey Taxi!...
We're going to the "Good Times Bakery!"
"So,
Let's go upstairs with me
and
you can prove it!"
"Wow!... you're Lucky lady...
Make him!
But you're right!
And this right here
is also the "Prove It To Me Blog!"
Yep!
The proof is in the Puddin'!
Well, hey...
for Today's Blog...
I'm the"Smooth Facilitator-Slash-Moderator-Slash-
Errthang Else!
I take "All Comers!""
So,
"Hot Stuff" Ladies In The House!...
I need to know how many ways
you plan to indulge that
Big-Chested and
Baby-Faced HSR!....
"Why, Thank you, Slash!...
Hey, Facilitator...
I like the sound of that...
It sounds so attention-getting!
But,
I must say...
"Wow, Doctor Report...
you're the only Dentist that I know who
comes to the patient's place
and walks them back to the office for an appointment!
I must say that I do like the personal attention!
and this time, I promise to be the perfect patient!
But, I
must confess...
I did have a little piece of candy
so...
I'll be ready for your discipline
at the office,
and
I can't wait"
"Thank you, Oh "Person Who Brings It!
Hey, HSR!...
Come on and give me some, HSR
How you gonna be so good
and then hold back on me
making me desperate and
wanting it even more!
Well, anyway...let's go inside and eat
and
I'll show you why you should change your mind!"
"Whoa...
I don't have to change...
My mind is made up!
Hollywood...when you
look deep into my eyes
and give me your smile
and your patented
tight squeeze
I know I'm in the right place!"
"Go on, Girl!
I don't hate the Game, and
I don't hate the Players!
But,
I do hate that
Time passes
and
HSR
has to leave my arms, too
and go to work in his Dental Office!
Because we all know that
a Man's gotta do what a Man's gotta do!
I'm just glad that I'm
"One That He Does!"
So...
What's next?"
"That Dr. Report's next!
I know that many have tried...
and succeeded!
And I
plan to be one of them, too!"
"OMG!
Hollywood, come here!
Can we "Hang?""
Now,...
you and your
"I like it when Dr. Report has client kids with no cavities!...His whole
attitude and everything...is better!"
smiles are
stretching your lucks
just incessantly
eating the
good sweet stuff!"
"Hey, Dr. Report!...
I'm your patient Amanda!
Look at me!
Bet you can't catch me!"
Since his High School teacher wants to
expose the students more
to another completely different language,
She is having them learn Braille
And this is how the blog will
be presented today...
But the kids
and especially HSR
keep liking to peek at their
Pretty Teacher!
"HSR...I'm your "Double Spy" Contact!...
 |
The information package, please!
What?
Is that the only way
I can get it?
 |
at least two hours?
And you want to be my new
"Handler?""
"HSR!
I left my purse at your place,
but
I need a little sugar fix!...
What will I do for a can of soda?
Well, if you want to know,
just get one and
"Pop The Top And See!"
"Listen to your Parents!
I'm talking to you
especially, HSR!
You see,
HSR always wants to do
what his older brother did
but,
sometimes it didn't work out!
And his sister is no one
to fool with!
But,
as you can probably tell,
Both Parents knew that
unpredictable things
happen...
and..
they didn't send HSR to
a good PreSchool
for Nuthin!"
So, they gave him a choice!...
"Be a Dentist...
or we both...
take you in the Ring!"
...And the "Rest Is History!"
So, they gave him a choice!...
"Be a Dentist...
or we both...
take you in the Ring!"
...And the "Rest Is History!"
So, today,
HSR wishes to,
again,
scour the city's and countryside's
again,
scour the city's and countryside's
happenings with his
visual and audio telescope!
Yes!
This laser-assisted
technology allows him to hear
technology allows him to hear
the sounds being produced by what he sees
through the lens!
and this preface is a
continuation of the thread from
"Can You Tell A...Smile By It's Cover?...,"
...
"HOLLYWOOD, MY DEAR
WHAT ARE
SOME OF THE THINGS THAT
YOU SEE
WITH YOUR SILLY LITTLE
MICROSCOPE?"
"TELESCOPE!...IT'S A TELESCOPE, SWEETIE!"
SAYS HSR, "AND, NO... I AM NOT A
PEEPING TOM,
LOOKING AT LADIES
THROUGH THEIR WINDOWS!...I JUST
LIKE WATCHING THE FUNNY THINGS THAT
HAPPEN IN THIS CRAZY CITY,
FROM THIS INSANE PERCH
THAT'S MY MOMMA'S HOUSE!"...
"WELL, GO AHEAD AND KNOCK YOURSELF OUT!...
I'LL BE IN THE BEDROOM RELAXING, MKAY,
DEAR!,"
SHE PURRS.
NOW,
HSR SWINGS HIS TELESCOPE AROUND
JUST LIKE A CAPTAIN
OF THE SEAS!
"OH MY!
WHAT A NICE
through the lens!
and this preface is a
continuation of the thread from
"Can You Tell A...Smile By It's Cover?...,"
...
"HOLLYWOOD, MY DEAR
WHAT ARE
SOME OF THE THINGS THAT
YOU SEE
WITH YOUR SILLY LITTLE
MICROSCOPE?"
"TELESCOPE!...IT'S A TELESCOPE, SWEETIE!"
SAYS HSR, "AND, NO... I AM NOT A
PEEPING TOM,
LOOKING AT LADIES
THROUGH THEIR WINDOWS!...I JUST
LIKE WATCHING THE FUNNY THINGS THAT
HAPPEN IN THIS CRAZY CITY,
FROM THIS INSANE PERCH
THAT'S MY MOMMA'S HOUSE!"...
"WELL, GO AHEAD AND KNOCK YOURSELF OUT!...
I'LL BE IN THE BEDROOM RELAXING, MKAY,
DEAR!,"
SHE PURRS.
NOW,
HSR SWINGS HIS TELESCOPE AROUND
JUST LIKE A CAPTAIN
OF THE SEAS!
"OH MY!
WHAT A NICE
GARDEN SETTING!
"OH NO!
A MUGGING IN
REAL TIME!
"OH,
I'M JUST CALLING MY
GIRLFRIEND'S
BOYFRIEND!" SHE SAYS...
I GUESS THERE'S
NO SWIMMING TODAY!
YOUNG MAN!...
THAT TANTRUM
WON'T MAKE THINGS
ANY BETTER!
HEY GUYS...
CAN WE
SOLVE THIS VERBALLY?
OKAY...
A FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD
CRAP GAME...
BUT...
UPON CLOSER EXAMINATION!...
I GUESS THERE WON'T BE ANY
CHEATING!...
WELL,
LET'S TRY THE PARK!...
AWW, THIS IS
TOO SWEET!
GOOD JOB!...
BUT,
YOU MIGHT WANT TO
WATCH WHERE YOU'RE HEADED!
NOW,
I KNOW THIS GUY IS FROM
MIT!
WAIT!...
IS THIS
FOR REAL?
I WONDER IF THIS
"FAST-ON-THE-FEET" GUY
ALSO
DOES BOXING?
TO GET TO KNOW HER
ONE MUST
WALK A MILE...
IN HER PANTS!
BLOCK PARTY!...
I WANT TO
GO THERE!
BUT, OF COURSE!
WHAT'S A WORLD
WITHOUT LOVE?
"HI, HOLLYWOOD!" SAYS THIS LADY
WHO CLIMBED
WAY UP,
"I'VE BEEN WATCHING YOU...
...CAN YOU KEEP THE WINDOW OPEN
SO I WON'T FALL WAY
WAY
DOWN
AND
TALK TO ME?"
THEN,
HOLLYWOOD'S GIRLFRIEND
QUICKLY RUNS OVER AND
SLAMS THE WINDOW SHUT,
(OMG! DOES THE GIRL FALL WAY, WAY DOWN?)
AND HIS FRIEND SAYS,
"HEY BIG BOY!...
I HAVE A
PLEASANT SURPRISE FOR YOU!"
"Some hot sauces are the spices
of life! "
OMG!...
This beautiful day is so nice!
I'm with my cute boyfriend, and
he has some pretty eyes
And,
yes!
He just got his braces off!
and now
he looks soooo good!
And his anatomically-optimized smile melts me
everytime!
So, we get a little busy
greeting each other into the New Day!
And it's "Scrumpcious!"
Now, we take a shower, and
Wow!...
It gets way more
Scrumpcious!
And after a long time...
we finally get ready!
Yes!...
we have a "Juicy Relationship!"
And I am so glad to have him!
I remember when we first met
in high school!
I had so many dreams
about him!
And all the other girls
just couldn't
get enough of him!
And now...
we are at a restaurant, and
I have to go
to the Ladies Room,
and
this woman,
slyly slinks over and sitsin a
booth next to us,
and waits for me to
go to the break room,
and then,
she says to my Man,
"Hi...remember our good times high school?
Well, I learned some New Techniques
that will totally "electrify you!"
Here's my number!"
Then she
and that's when I come back!
Now,
I see that note for him
and I grab it and
"tear it up!"
...into extremely small pieces...
Just like that!
I'm tellin' you!...
These "Bs"
out there are Crazy!.
Leave me and my Man alone!
So,
now, after our meal,
we go to the Car Maintenance Place
to get an oil change!
...
"Good Day, you two!
What can I do you for?"
"Well, I'm overdue for an oil change," I tell him.
"If you want your car to keep going," the guy says,
"you've got to keep the engine oil fresh!"
"Okay...let's do it!" I tell him.
So,
I sign the paper work,
and,
the guy calls out,
"Emma...
we got a "Quickie Lubie" right here!"
"Sure Sam," this lady says,
"as soon as I finish this hot wiring!"
"Well folks,
I guess I gotta use the girls in back
to get you out of here soon!"
So,
me and my Boyfriend walk back and
see this "crew!"
"We love doing Lube Jobs, so the pistons go in and out
with no problems!" says one of them!
"Personally," says another, "I like going
zero to sixty in...
twenty minutes!"
And the third one says,
"We want you to come back again and again
so we can do it over and over!"
So,
those ladies do their job quickly and efficiently,
all the while
checking out my Man!
I don't want to set them straight now,
because I don't want them
messing up my car!
And when they finally finish,
one of them bends
way
way
over by
the front tire, and says,
"You should get your break pads
changed soon!
Yes, you should come back and see us sometimes," as they oogle
at my boyfriend!
but you should leave your sister at home!"
"Thank you ladies," I sternly tell them,
but
he's my Boyfriend!"
"Okay...if you say so!" says one of them...
Now, we drive away
and...
what's this!...
I'm finding four, no
five slips of paper that they left in the
car for my Boyfriend to
reach out to them!
Wow!...those Hussies!
I ain't never going back there!
Well,
I start the car and leave
but right next door
at the open air cafe
these women are making catcalls
and those calls aren't
for me!
"Hey, would you like to
go to the beach?" I ask my Boyfriend...
"Sure, Dear...I just Love you in
your bikini!"
And I smile...
But,
when we get there,
there's a whole lot of
this...
and a whole lotta
that!
But,
I'm confident with
my own body, so,
I slip off my clothes to show my
bangin'
bikini,
and we walk out to the water,
but
this girl,
on purpose,
bumps into my Boyfriend's arm!
and
another girl in the water says,
"Hi there, Romeo!...I remember you!
But,
a wave gets her
and gets that _____ch good!
Now,
who are these people
trying to get my Boyfriend's
attention?"
So,
we decide to go back in the water,
but,
this lady surfer passes by him and says
"You should go deep in the tube with me, Boy!"
And I think...
"The nerve of that girl!"
And later on...
What's this!
My boyfriend says,
"It looks like she's drowning!"
And I say, "No, she's not!...
...and don't give her CPR!...
She's just faking it!"
...
So,
finally...
my Boyfriend says,
"Hey Honey, ya wanna go home
and watch a movie?"
And I say, "Sure!"
...
But when we get home,
we watch the movie
a little bit,
and then we
decide to lay down
and
wouldn't you know?...
...the
"Sparks Start To Fly!"
"You better keep Yo' Man "leashed up" and "on empty," Gurl!
'Cause once I tap him...
May you have many...
...It works, Hollywood!...
For two nights,
I went to sleep expecting to dream about
you...and us!
Of course, we did
this, that,
and the other thing...
but then it starts to get crazy,
because,
you want me to be
"In Stereo!"...
..."The Bright Lights!
and the Big City!
I used to give a blanket approval...and Love!...to this area!
And I really liked that song "Downtown!"
But, as I matured
I'm finding that not everything so pretty and luminous...
You have to watch your back...and your front!
But,
I still come down here because
I still come down here because
where else is the true nexus
of Civilization!"...
..."I'm so glad that we happened to meet
in the Ukraine last week!
and now,
that we're back in the States,
there are so many things
I'd like to do to you...I mean
...smiles!
"Are you sure that
you want us to do this?
Because once it starts,
you can't stop!
And, anyway,
you always say,
"A little _____ never hurt anybody!"...
Come on!"
"Well,
I love puttin' a hurtin' on Hollywood
because
because his bad little self
deserves every last drop!"
"OMG!,
HSR...
Your "Realities"
even exceed
my "Fantasies!"
"Dr. Report,
The Bentley is ready outside,
and yes...
I have the
Grey Poupon!"
"So,
you ran right on over here
after the Show?
Well,
I won't disappoint!"
"HSR took me to his place...and it was great!...but...
you can't pry his address out of me
even with
a Crowbar!"
Hollywood...
You're the "Love Of My Life!"
Do I ever want to leave you???"...
...
"No way!"
"Hi, Erica!
in your
"Winter Wonderland?"
"Yes, My Sweet Dollie HSR!
Sure it's cold outside, and
and the snow is picturesque!...
But,
the most fun for us is going to be
keeping each other warm!"
